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My Abduction Story

Printed From: Tippmann Paintball
Category: News And Views
Forum Name: Thoughts and Opinions
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URL: http://www.tippmannsports.com/forum/wwf77a/forum_posts.asp?TID=136838
Printed Date: 22 January 2026 at 6:55pm
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Topic: My Abduction Story
Posted By: .Ryan
Subject: My Abduction Story
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:09am
Somewhere in Ohio.....

Ok so, last week I was just walkin down the street after hanging out with my girlfriend at about 2:00 AM when I suddenly found myself enveloped in a very bright blue light. I then found myself floating upwards and looked up to see a giant flying saucer with a large round opening in the middle. They took me in and forced me to lay on a small metal table. Luckily they were only about 3 and a half feet tall and around 40 pounds so they couldn't keep me there for long. I got up, flinging the little gray butt monkeys around the room in my efforts, and made my way to a hallway. I came upon a small dimmly lit room with racks of laser blasters on each wall and what appeared to be some sort of powered armor suit which was, to my dismay only about 3 feet tall....Luckily, it was also rather light so I pick it and one of the nifty laser blasters up and headed down the hallway to the brightly lit room at the end. This room was the cockpit. I forced the two piolets to land in my back yard and proceeded to blast then into small green piles of goo before they could contact their mother ship. I subsequently cleared the entire ship of those nasty little gray guys, save one whom is now tied up in my basement, and pulled a large tarp over my new toy. In the next three days I emptied the ship of any books, computers, and technology that struck my fancy including a universal translator which came in handy in reading all of the instruction manuals and conversing with my new, yet captive friend. I have since mastered the art of telepathy and modified the powerarmor to fit me. I hid the ship at the bottom of a local lake for future use as well. I haven't decided what to do with Tork(the captive alien) but He should be able to help me in my future endevors. By the way, learn this phrase well: "All hail Empiror Ryan" and get used to the word "Sire". See you soon.





ps
  If anyone has questions for Tork I will gladly ask then relay the answers to you.


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Replies:
Posted By: Dan db09
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:10am
Thanks God I was smart enought to go to the bottom of your thread before reading all of that...


Posted By: RenegadeGopher
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:11am
This is stupid.


Posted By: RustyNail
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:12am
I DEMAND PICS


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This sig doesnt fly.
A-5
E-Grip
Lapco Bigshot 12" (Bead Blasted)
Maddmann Spring Kit


Posted By: Panda Man
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:12am


/me just sits and stares at it.


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Posted By: Dan db09
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:13am
Originally posted by Panda Man Panda Man wrote:



/me just sits and stares at it.


lol


Posted By: Panda Man
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:13am
now I stole it!

muhahhahaha!


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Posted By: Dan db09
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:14am
as long as i know I had it before you lol... i dont care lol


Posted By: PlentifulBalls
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:14am
I like you.

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sporx wrote:
well...ya i prolly will be a virgin till i'm at least 30.


Posted By: RustyNail
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:16am
sexy

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This sig doesnt fly.
A-5
E-Grip
Lapco Bigshot 12" (Bead Blasted)
Maddmann Spring Kit


Posted By: .Ryan
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:17am
Presto Changeo!

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Posted By: Panda Man
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:18am
the burning man Army.








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Posted By: RustyNail
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:19am





-------------
This sig doesnt fly.
A-5
E-Grip
Lapco Bigshot 12" (Bead Blasted)
Maddmann Spring Kit


Posted By: Dan db09
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:20am


another one for your enjoyment Panda


Posted By: Panda Man
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:21am
AHAHA

Screw burning man, I want that one!


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Posted By: RustyNail
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:23am
Originally posted by Panda Man Panda Man wrote:

AHAHA

Screw burning man, I want that one!

I WILL REMAIN LOYAL TO BURNING MAN!


-------------
This sig doesnt fly.
A-5
E-Grip
Lapco Bigshot 12" (Bead Blasted)
Maddmann Spring Kit


Posted By: Monk
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:27am
I have a question for "Tork". How do aliens "do it".


Posted By: Dan db09
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:28am
ear muffs


Posted By: rockerdoode
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 2:55am

That happened to you too?



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"According to Sue Johanson, theres nothing that can increase your manhood, trust me I've already looked into it for myself." -Zata


Posted By: Homer J
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 7:48am
So were the aliens like...really hot?


Posted By: pbdude985
Date Posted: 30 June 2005 at 7:48am

Originally posted by Dan db09 Dan db09 wrote:



another one for your enjoyment Panda

lol thats great



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