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Assassin Interview

Printed From: Tippmann Paintball
Category: News And Views
Forum Name: Thoughts and Opinions
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URL: http://www.tippmannsports.com/forum/wwf77a/forum_posts.asp?TID=182660
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Topic: Assassin Interview
Posted By: Impulse88
Subject: Assassin Interview
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 11:13am

After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists for the CIA assassin position — two men and one woman.

For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.

"We must know that you will follow your instructions, no matter what the circumstances. Inside this room you will find your wife sitting in a chair. You have to kill her."

The first man said. "You can’t be serious. I could never shoot my wife."

The agent replies, "Then you’re not the right man for this job."

The second man was given the same instructions. He took the gun and went into the room.

All was quiet for about five minutes. Then the agent came out with tears in his eyes. "I tried, but I can’t kill my wife."

The agent replies "You don’t have what it takes. Take your wife and go home."

Finally, it was the woman’s turn. Only she was told to kill her husband. She took the gun and went into the room.

Shots were heard, one shot after another. They heard screaming, crashing, banging on the walls.

After a few minutes, all was quiet. The door opened slowly and there stood the woman.

She wiped the sweat from her brow and said, "You guys didn’t tell me the gun was loaded with blanks. So I had to beat him to death with the chair."




Replies:
Posted By: Benjichang
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 11:40am
FWD:FWD:FWD

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irc.esper.net
#paintball


Posted By: agentwhale007
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 11:43am
Originally posted by Benjichang Benjichang wrote:

FWD:FWD:FWD


Posted By: Impulse88
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 11:46am
Originally posted by Benjichang Benjichang wrote:

FWD:FWD:FWD
 
Really? Well I thought it was funny, hopefully people who haven't seen it will enjoy it.


Posted By: ammolord
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 11:56am
I havnt seen it, so i lol'd.

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PSN Tag: AmmoLord
XBL: xXAmmoLordXx


~Minister of Tinkering With Things That Go "BOOM!"(AKA Minister of Munitions)~


Posted By: Mack
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 11:59am
I laughed as well.

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Posted By: StormyKnight
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 4:28pm
OLD

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Posted By: sinisterNorth
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 5:06pm
Originally posted by StormyKnight StormyKnight wrote:

OLD


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Pumpker'd; (V.) When a pump player runs up and shoots you at point blank range because you thought 20bps made you good.


Posted By: Destruction
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 5:12pm
OLD:OLD:OLD

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u dont know what to do ur getting mottor boatted

Men are from Magmar, women are from Venusaur.


Posted By: brihard
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 6:02pm
Still funny.


Saying 'FWD:FWD:FWD:' isn't cruise control for cool.


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"Abortion is not "choice" in America. It is forced and the democrats are behind it, with the goal of eugenics at its foundation."

-FreeEnterprise, 21 April 2011.

Yup, he actually said that.


Posted By: oldpbnoob
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 6:19pm
I laughed, so will everyone else that I forward it to.


Posted By: tallen702
Date Posted: 11 August 2009 at 9:04pm
what kind of assassin wouldn't check the magazine before pulling the trigger?

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<Removed overly wide sig. Tsk, you know better.>


Posted By: Kayback
Date Posted: 12 August 2009 at 1:40am
Hold the gun close enough to the target and the blank will kill them anyway.

Ask Jon-Erik Hexum.

KBK


Posted By: adrenalinejunky
Date Posted: 12 August 2009 at 3:30am
Originally posted by brihard brihard wrote:

Still funny.
Saying 'FWD:FWD:FWD:' isn't cruise control for cool.


Posted By: Glassjaw
Date Posted: 12 August 2009 at 10:05am


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The desire for polyester is just to powerful.


Posted By: jmac3
Date Posted: 12 August 2009 at 5:06pm
Originally posted by tallen702 tallen702 wrote:

what kind of assassin wouldn't check the magazine before pulling the trigger?


Exactly, should have been sent back to the kitchen.


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Que pasa?




Posted By: tallen702
Date Posted: 12 August 2009 at 8:01pm
Originally posted by Kayback Kayback wrote:

Hold the gun close enough to the target and the blank will kill them anyway.

Ask Jon-Erik Hexum.

KBK


Or Brandon Lee if you want someone a little less obscure.

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<Removed overly wide sig. Tsk, you know better.>


Posted By: I<3FE
Date Posted: 12 August 2009 at 11:23pm
Originally posted by jmac3 jmac3 wrote:

Originally posted by tallen702 tallen702 wrote:

what kind of assassin wouldn't check the magazine before pulling the trigger?


Exactly, should have been sent back to the kitchen.


Where in the joke did it say they took out the magazine?


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Posted By: Kayback
Date Posted: 13 August 2009 at 2:42am
Eh, I was gonna say Brandon Lee, but it wasn't the blank that killed him. It was the sound engineer.

KBK

Edit, Kefe, there is a visual difference between a blank and a live round. Any real steely eyed killer would have popped the mag to check how many bullets they had, and worked the slide to make sure the gun was actually loaded. Thus negating about 98% of the story.

KBK


Posted By: Mack
Date Posted: 13 August 2009 at 3:08am
Originally posted by tallen702 tallen702 wrote:

Originally posted by Kayback Kayback wrote:

Hold the gun close enough to the target and the blank will kill them anyway.

Ask Jon-Erik Hexum.

KBK


Or Brandon Lee if you want someone a little less obscure.


Hey, I knew who he was.


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Posted By: Captain Obvious
Date Posted: 13 August 2009 at 11:47pm
How many people of a certain demographic does it take to perform a specific task?

A finite number.  One to perform said task, and the rest to act in a manner stereotypically associated with that demographic.



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