I just had the best night ever

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   **I am sorry if this is a choppy read, but i am still... recovering**

I was at the beach yesterday.  That night, at about 10:00, i was walking
on the beach and encountered several girls.  8 of them, all about a
year older than me, no guys anywhere.   I smelled beer; they were
sloshed.

I began talking to them.  All 8 of them seemed to express little interest in
me.  When they asked me what i wanted to be when i grew up, I used my
knowledge of the female psyche to turn the tables.  I said "I want to
be an engineer so i will have enough money to buy my wife whatever she
wants, because she will be all that matters to me"

After hearing that, they all became very
interested in me and began asking me various... uh... anatomical
questions.  One girl, succumbing to my charm, asked if she could give
me a lap dance.  I said [yes] and all 8 circled around me.  I noticed
they were all wearing thongs.  What followed was very relevant to my
interests, and i will suffice to say that it involved wedgies of a sort
that were... very enjoyable.

After about 10-15 minutes of that, they asked if if would determine
which one of them had the nicest [domes].  It was unfourtunate that it
was very dark on this particular beach, but for what i was doing, i did
not really need to see as the feeling alone was more than enough.  One girl was upset because i did not grab her [domes] as much as she would have liked.  I apologized and corrected my mistake.  Overcorrected, actually.

If the preceding is pushing the limits of forum appropriateness,  what followed after that is out of the ballpark.  So i will have to be curt and say:

A nine-some with 8 chicks > * > anything that has ever happened in my life