I thought this was funny....

   1) Growing  old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
   2) Forget the health food.. I need all the preservatives I can get.
   3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down
  there.
   4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair
   that you once got from a roller coaster.
   5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask
   you the questions.
   6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
   7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

   THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

   1)    You believe in Santa Claus.
   2)    You don't believe in Santa Claus.
   3)    You are Santa Claus.
   4)    You look like Santa Claus.