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New Virus!!! |
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TheUnknown.
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Joined: 26 February 2005 Status: Offline Points: 60 |
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Topic: New Virus!!!Posted: 27 April 2005 at 9:15pm |
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A Warning: If you receive an e-mail entitled "Bad
times", delete it IMMEDIATELY. Do not open it. Apparently this one is pretty nasty. It will not only erase everything on your hard drive, but it will also delete anything on disks within 20 feet of your computer. It demagnetizes the strips on ALL of your credit cards. It reprograms your ATM access code, screws up the tracking on your VCR and uses subspace field harmonics to scratch any CD's you attempt to play. It will program your phone auto-dial to call only 900 numbers. This virus will mix antifreeze into your fish tank. IT WILL CAUSE YOUR TOILET TO FLUSH WHILE YOU ARE SHOWERING. It will drink ALL your beer. FOR GOD'S SAKE, ARE YOU LISTENING?? It will leave dirty underwear on the coffee table when you are expecting company. It will replace your shampoo with Nair and your Nair with Rogaine, all the while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind your back and billing their hotel rendezvous to your Visa card. It will cause you to run with scissors and throw things in a way that is only fun until someone loses an eye. It will rewrite your backup files, changing all your active verbs to passive tense and incorporating undetectable misspellings which grossly change the interpretations of key sentences. If the "Badtimes" message opened in a Windows 95/98 environment, it will leave the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer plugged in dangerously close to a full bathtub. It will not only remove the forbidden tags from your mattresses and pillows, it will also refill your skim milk with whole milk. ******* WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN. ******* And if you don't send this to 5000 people in 20 seconds you'll fart so hard that your right leg will spasm and shoot straight out in front of you, sending sparks that will ignite the person nearest you. Send to everyone ..... In case you are a blonde, this is a joke. |
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Cedric
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Unit Joined: 24 November 2004 Status: Offline Points: 4240 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 9:18pm |
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...
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TruePaintballer
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Strike 1 - Spam 11-19 Joined: 03 July 2004 Location: Canada Status: Offline Points: 4083 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 9:19pm |
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lol thats awesome
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DBibeau855
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IIIIIMMMMM BAAACCCKKK Joined: 26 November 2002 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 11662 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 9:23pm |
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I got a couple chuckles.
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PB MISFIT
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Salty Marshmellow Man #1 Joined: 21 September 2002 Location: Lao People’s Dem. Rep. Status: Offline Points: 6158 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 9:28pm |
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Reading this, I thought it was the coolest, most badass virus around. Then it just got funny.
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Bolt3
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What? Joined: 01 February 2005 Location: New Jersey Status: Offline Points: 4 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 10:05pm |
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Yah, I was a believer until the fish tank thing.
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HondaXR
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Makes Foxworthy Look Like a Yankee Joined: 10 June 2002 Location: Alabama Status: Offline Points: 2740 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 10:17pm |
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Hot Damn, I better get to sendin'...
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SL68II
Pro/Am 68 Carbine |
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meteora
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Joined: 28 December 2003 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 1892 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 10:19pm |
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i started reading it and was....holy $h!t this sucks..then burst out laughing through the funny parts, now its my away message
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Ilovepaintball1
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Guested. Trouble maker. Joined: 02 August 2004 Location: Christmas Island Status: Offline Points: 4532 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 10:23pm |
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You suck.
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Props to my Dogg BLAND |
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themovielife
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Guested - Racism Joined: 11 June 2002 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 2951 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 10:34pm |
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TheUnknown.
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Joined: 26 February 2005 Status: Offline Points: 60 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 11:01pm |
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I love you too... |
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Ilovepaintball1
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Guested. Trouble maker. Joined: 02 August 2004 Location: Christmas Island Status: Offline Points: 4532 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 11:03pm |
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No? |
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Props to my Dogg BLAND |
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Psyrecx
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Follows in HondaXRs footsteps... Joined: 14 April 2005 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 860 |
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Posted: 27 April 2005 at 11:15pm |
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People still own VCR's?
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This sig is brought to you by Psyrecx, thanks to D-Town Balla. |
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usafpilot07
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FreeEnterprise's #1 Fan & Potty Mouth Joined: 31 August 2004 Location: Tokelau Status: Offline Points: 4626 |
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Posted: 28 April 2005 at 5:08am |
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yea, i started to check my email in another tab till i kept reading
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Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo
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oreomann33
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Can you say ... ZAZZy? Joined: 11 March 2004 Location: Turkey Status: Offline Points: 8100 |
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Posted: 28 April 2005 at 5:35am |
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I ignited the person nearest me.
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MetallicaESPa5
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The Doors Of Perception Joined: 31 March 2004 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 6331 |
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Posted: 28 April 2005 at 5:39am |
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Hah.
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pbdude985
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Dude! Sweet! Dude! Sweet! Dude! Sweet! Joined: 13 July 2004 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 6876 |
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Posted: 28 April 2005 at 6:14am |
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lol i was thinkin wow this is a bad virus then i read the toilet one very funny
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youm0nt
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MY CAPS LOCK IS STUCK HELP!!!!!!!!! Joined: 10 June 2002 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 22576 |
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Posted: 28 April 2005 at 6:39am |
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Project Irene
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It really DOES exist! Joined: 27 January 2004 Location: United States Status: Offline Points: 4219 |
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Posted: 28 April 2005 at 6:40am |
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Hey, the fart thing is pretty fun. I've killed three people.
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ScarFace22
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Guested. Prejudice crap. Joined: 29 August 2004 Location: Italy Status: Offline Points: 1760 |
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Posted: 28 April 2005 at 6:57am |
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Check my thread in the Great guns thread for Timmy tech help or PM me |
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